Another wonderful prompt from Totally Optional Prompts -- click here to read the original, by Ted Kooser. I never really "got" him, thought he was pleasant enough, but this poem stuck in my head all week.
Drugstore Perfume
She stands in a yellowed bathroom, lathers
vanilla-scented moisturizer on freshly
shaved legs. Grits her teeth against
the sting of open nicks, watches red
bumps raise on white skin. In the smell
of vanilla mingled with the light
metallic tang of blood, she breathes in
1989, breathes in fluorescent pink clouds
of Love's Baby Soft and the white cotton
tampon threads, tangled in the black leather
recesses of her dirty purse. All
that's missing from this seventh grade
scenario are the blue gray clouds
of an eight grader's cigarette butt and
the burning desperation to be noticed
and not noticed, all at once. Wait,
that's still there, hiding beneath the blood.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Drugstore Perfume
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16 Comments:
this was so perfect.. i am there i am with you,, for all those things i mourn... and then not at all
I would not go back to middle school days if someone paid me! You captured the angst and longing so well! And Love's Baby Soft. Oh my gosh. I haven't thought about that in years. I wonder if they still make it? I wonder if a soccer dad will smell me wearing it and want me...oh no, wait, I'm a grown woman now...
You captured this time extremely well. Wouldn't turn the clock back for anything. It's even painful watching my children move through these middle school years. Nicely written poem.
Time tangles up poets all over the place doesn't it? Great emotional power here.
I read this once, then had to come back and read it again. I have a feeling that this one is going to stick with me for a while. Nicely done.
A great piece that says so much. The last line is superb!
Oh. Yes, those were the days...or not. Certainly, your words describe them so well, they bring back thoughts I was sure were dusted away!
This is great. I'm in middle school and I can really relate to this.
I have a blog that I keep:
http://academyofdiscovery.com/lingling/
You did a great job with the prompt - a close up inspection of a seemingly ordinary event. Maybe nothing is really ordinary afterall.
Wow. You brought back a lot. Great poem. Love the last line.
PS--the ad photo is creepy now, while at the time it was displayed I probably didn't think so. That blows me away, too.
sting of open nicks - feels/sounds painful. Hate all those girly smells, but the whole thing reads really well.
I just finished reading 'The Tenth Circle' by Jodi Picoult. Similar thoughts were racing in my mind. I come here and read this...
Aren't our teenagers growing faster than they should? I feel so sad...
Kooser is a good poet.
the burning desperation to be noticed
and not noticed, all at once.
...sums it up so perfectly. Add me to this list of those who would never ever go back :-)
i agree with Andy Sewina aka Danny Wise
feels/sounds painful.
How To Make A Good First Impression?
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